The old man in his mid-eighties struggles to get up from the couch then starts putting on his coat. His wife, seeing the unexpected behaviour, asks, "Where are you going?" He replies,...

On a shopping trip to the city, a backwoods farmer bought a 24-piece jigsaw puzzle. He worked on it every night for two weeks. Finally, the puzzle was finished. "Look what I've done,...

Santa Singh sent his bio data to America to apply for a post in Microsoft. A few days later he got this reply:- Dear Mr. Singh, You do not meet our requirements. Please do not send any further...

One day when returning from school the 6 year old girl politely asked her dad- "daddy where did I come from?" The girls dad had been preparing for this question for a long time and so began...

Results of a recent research shows that there are 7 kinds of sex. The 1st kind of sex is called: Smurf Sex. * This kind of sex happens when you first meet someone, and you both have sex until you...

Husband : (Returning late form work) "Good Evening Dear, I'm now logged in." Wife : Have you brought the ring ? Husband : Bad command or file name. Wife : But I told you in the morn......

Uncle Sam, a Canadian, and Osama bin Laden are walking down the beach when they find a genie's lamp. The Canadian rubs it and a genie pops out and gives them all a wish. The Canadian goes first. He...

Boss, to four of his employees: "I'm really sorry, but I'm going to have to let one of you go." Black Employee: "I'm a protected minority." Female Employee: "And I'm a...

A man was carrying 2 babies, one in each arm while waiting for a train. Along came this woman and seeing the 2 cute babies started asking the man, "Aren't they cute, what are their names?"...

A henpecked husband was advised by a psychiatrist to assert himself. "You don't have to let your wife bully you," he said. "Go home and show her you're the boss." The husband...

Baap beti se: Pehle tum mujh ko papa kahte the ab dady kuyn kahte hoo, Kiya wajah hia ? Beti: Papa kehne se lipstick jo kharab hoo jate hai!

There were two Russian presidents and George Bush. The first Russian president dropped a star on his country and said, "God I love my country." The second Russian president dropped a star...

A man ran into a lady by the lobby and said, "If your heart is as soft as your boobs you will forgive me" and she replied saying, "if your dick is a hard as your elbow I am in Room...

The Mother Superior instructs two nuns to paint a new room in the convent. "And don't get a drop of paint on your habits," she sternly admonishes. The two nuns decide that the only way...

Two women are hiking in the woods. After an hour or so, they come to a stream. Unable to cross, they decide to walk along the stream and look for a narrower place. Fortunately they come to an old...

Two children are in a doctor's waiting room, and one of them is crying. "Why are you crying?" asked the other child. "I'm here for a blood test, and they're going to cut my...

Little Janice was not the best student in Sunday school. Usually she slept through class. One day the teacher called on her while she was napping, "Tell me Janice, who created the universe?" When...

A man walks into a bar with a monkey he had just bought at the pet store. He sits down at the bar and orders a beer. The monkey jumps down off his shoulder and runs over to the pool table and ate the...

Once there was were three guys that were standing at the top of a building. One had a knife, another had a brick, and the last one had a bomb. The first one dropped the knives off the building and...

A bill collector knocked on the door of a country debtor. "Is Fred home?" he asked the woman who answered the door. "Sorry," the woman replied. "Fred's gone for...